March 10 marked 5 months with my Doomie. It also happened to be the day we closed on our first house. Life is getting pretty crazy and it’s hard to believe I have a house, a good job, and a man who loves and adores me with his whole being. I never thought I would have what I have now and I am awestruck every time I stop to think about it, which is often.
Something about this relationship is different than every other relationship I have ever been in. When looking for a romantic partner, number 1 on my list is that they have to be a Christian. That’s rather broad, though. After Bible college, it shifted a bit. I wanted a man who loves Jesus, who knew and understood the working of the Holy Spirit, who had a real and tangible relationship with God. I didn’t just want a Christian; I wanted a man after the heart of God, a man who could lead a family, and a man who would sacrifice for his faith.
Even though I desired these things, I didn’t truly believe I would ever have them. Which is pretty sad to think about now – I just didn’t think I deserved or was worthy of the love/life I desired. I barely even asked for it, thinking I was too damaged to have it. So, it came as quite the surprise when I met exactly who I had been looking for in the most unlikely of places.
A discord server for a mobile game is where I met this man. One day, I’ll write the whole story. (You can hold me to that.) And the things I have learned about and from him make me want to be the best version of myself in every area. He challenges me, he makes me laugh, he pushes me, he loves me, and while these things are amazing, he also pushes me towards God and never away from Him.
And let me tell you something else. I am attracted to this man. Like mannnnn, this guy is soooooo good looking and everything I want. But listen, I am absolutely most attracted to him when he is talking about the missionaries he’s read about or heard speak and tears start streaming down his face. I am most attracted to my husband when I see him out of the corner of my eye at church with his hands raised worshipping. I find him the absolute most attractive when he starts talking about the sovereignty of God and he can’t even finish speaking because of the weight of his words tugging on his heart. His sincerity and humbleness, his intelligence and relentless digging into the Word, his pure heart and his specific way of approaching his faith not only makes him love him more and more everyday, but also makes me admire him and it pushes me to keep digging for myself. He is far above and beyond what I thought I deserved, and I thank God every single day that He put him in my life. I don’t know where I would be without him and God dropped him in at the exact right time.
My prayer for you is that you understand your worth today. I pray you know there is a God looking over you and wishing to give you the desires of your heart and that He works all things together for His good. I didn’t get lucky, I got God’s best. I pray if you’ve already found this person, you love and cherish them every second you can. You are loved. You are cherished. You are seen.
The Happy Otter